Influencing Type

Although I try not to be, I can definitely be influenced to buy something. I know that influencing is a career in advertising. When I’m on IG, I can clearly see that I fit into a “demographic.” Oh, how my angsty, “I’m all alone” teenage self would despair. How can I be like everyone else?!?! Well, not everyone else, but certainly in a group!

So, I’m sitting here typing with a hyped anti-puff face mask on. Yes, my face looked puffy this morning. And yes, I was lured by the promise in a jar. Nevermind that real anti-puffing would occur with healthy diet and exercise! Sheesh.

But the funny thing is that this overhyped miracle smells, and probably is, repackaged anti-hemorrhoid cream. How do I know this? Because in my teens, I was influenced by Seventeen to try anti-hemorrhoid cream as an undereye depuffer. I know the smell! And as I sit here in my expensive mask, I feel swindled!

Also, another funny hemorrhoid treatments story (they exist?!) is that when I was an intern, people would often ask each other to put in prescriptions for them as needed. Well, some of the guys thought it was hilarious to add Proctofoam and suppositories to each other’s order. It was a short fad since it was really only funny once, but it was pretty great since the person didn’t find out until the pharmacist reviewed each prescription.

6 thoughts on “Influencing Type

  1. I mean, it makes sense that hemorrhoid cream would decrease some puffiness, but there’s gotta be something better, right?!

    I was definitely influenced to buy a particular advent calendar this year solely because of an Instagram ad. You’re not alone in your inner teen feeling a terrible disappointment in my predictable Old Self.

    1. I haven’t seen this on an IG influencer account, but I am influenced by my Dad to buy the Mozart Chocolate Marzipan Advent Calendar by Reber. Mozartkugel = Christmas!

  2. I laughed SO hard about that prescription story.

    It reminds me of a story from someone I met in university – P: he was on a crowded elevator once, when the person next to him (who he DID know) farted. He immediately turned to P and said: P, is your stomach feeling okay? Do you have gas? So everyone thought P had farted. Oh man, this always makes me laugh though if it happened to me, I’d be so angry and mortified!!!

Leave a Reply

Discover more from Portmanteau Suitcase

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading